In 2019 I, Elizabeth, moved in with my father. We started a new life together and immediately the stakes got higher.
During the pandemic, we jokingly called our antics together “JohnBeckerTV”. We “tuned-in” daily for new episodes managing health, elder finances, setting up a home, balancing motherhood and caregiving, taking an epic cross-country road-trip, and planning for life’s inevitabilities. We tried to make even the difficult stuff lighter with laughter and love, pretending some days we were characters in a zany, and touching father-daughter sitcom.
Now for real we are telling the story of how dad, at 100 years old, is still living a life filled with learning and adventure, and how he is still very much a father. It’s also my story, as a business leader who becomes an interfaith chaplain and family caregiver.
It’s a story of resilience and RE-invention at any age. It’s a love story.
JBTV is a social media experience and also the home of a documentary film: The Dad Project: It's Never Too Late.
John Francis Becker was born in 1923 in Des Moines Iowa. He is currently 100 years old and lives in Oakland with me, his mid-50's daughter, Elizabeth. His health is great for his age though finally his years are starting to catch up with him. His mind is super sharp, and he does appreciate support staying on task!
A prolific reader, John is curious about everything - and particularly loves learning about his new state - often sitting for hours with maps and magnifying glasses. He is also known as Mr. Fix-It and had a world-class workshop in Pennsylvania where he fixed everything. Now he has mixed his transplanted tools in with those of the landlord's late husband, perhaps foreshadowing our next steps together!
On November 10th, we are celebrating a 101-DERFUL man! And to really light some virtual candles, we are giving you a special 101-DERFUL Man playlist with hits from the big band era including many of the artists who played at John Becker’s father’s Central Emporium, in Northwest Iowa on Lake Okoboji, in the 20s 30s 40s and 50s. My grandfather Adolph died in 1962 and my father, his sister, my Aunt Betty, and my grandmother Rose, sold the building in 1967.
These band leaders and their bandmates were on the circuit playing other dance halls throughout the Midwest on lakes just like my father grew up on. Performers like Lawrence Welk (Wunderful, Wunderful). Like Guy Lombardo (Mr Wonderful, It’s A Wonderful Life, A Wonderful Year). And like Louis Armstrong.
Armstrong‘s huge 1967 hit, “What A Wonderful World” is the inspiration for this year‘s John Becker birthday theme “What a Wonderful Man/101-DERFUL Man”! (Say it out loud!)
And it’s also an invitation to you, to sing along with us and to remember to “see” the beauty in life, even if you might not be able to see some things anymore, because perhaps, like dad, the eyes are seeing less, or perhaps things are tragically hard, or perhaps we are best served by softening our eyes and looking in the heart (points to chest, points to heart) where love is all there is.
John F. Becker is turning 100 in 2023! I am his caregiving partner and daughter, Elizabeth. Together, we are making a film about his still-adventurous life, the dynamics of family caregiving, and the transformative power of accessing Veterans' Benefits!
We invite you to become part of The Dad Project: It's Never Too Late!
- and support Dad in telling his story, creating his legacy - a movement around his goal -
"No One Ages Alone."
We anticipate several funding and creative milestones, and hope to complete a short version of the film in 2023 - the year of his 100th birthday!
John Becker loves to travel, to make things, to reuse things, to read and learn.
He is curious!
We are recently back from a week in Lake Tahoe at the home of some generous friends. There we walked the sugar pine forests, saw a mama bear and her cub, and flew on top of the waves on a very windy day on the lake. Dad loved every minute!
Every other year since 2015, Dad and I have embarked on a big adventure. As we traveled, we became closer and more ready to face the next steps of our lives.
2023
Where Will John Becker Go Next? - Vote for Your Favorite!
New Orleans, Louisiana - World War II Museum
Honolulu, Hawaii - Fort DeRussy - Hale Koa
Cross-Country Road Trip *Redux*
2021
JohnBeckerTV Cross-Country Road Trip
From California to New Jersey and Back
8300 miles!
2019
The Fall. The Recovery. The Move
Dad fell in CA and while not seriously injured, we decided to have him sell his home in PA and move west.
2017
The Danube Cruise
Budapest to Prague, then Road Trip through Germany and France, including Paris!
2015
The Rhine Cruise
Basel to Amsterdam, then Paris!
The Rosalynn Carter Institute for Caregivers was established in 1987 by former First Lady Rosalynn Carter to promote the health, strength, and resilience of all caregivers at every stage of their journey.
Learn more at https://rosalynncarter.org/
Redwood Caregiver Resource Center continues to provide services to family caregivers offering support and assistance to caregivers of adults with brain impairments through education, research, services and advocacy. Learn more at http://www.redwoodcrc.org/res.php
FCA provides services to family caregivers of adults with physical and cognitive impairments. Our services include assessment, care planning, direct care skills, wellness programs, respite services, and legal/financial consultation vouchers.
Learn more at https://www.caregiver.org/about-fca/
The Military and Veteran Caregiver Network (MVCN) offers peer-based support and services to connect those providing care to service members and veterans living with wounds, illnesses, injuries and/or aging. Learn more at the Red Cross website
Let us support you as you support your loved one. We can connect you with additional services such as:
Transportation to doctor visits, Family consultations, Information & referrals, Respite care, Simple meal preparation and errands, and much more. Lear more here
The CVSO helps veterans access State and Federal benefits that they and their family are entitled to. The CVSO also provides information and referrals to a wide range of services including housing, employment, and training.
Learn more here
Regardless of the care need, it takes leadership, know-how, organizational tools, sensitivity, and grace to pull off larger-scale care communities. There is no "one size fits all."
From The Chapalincy Institute (ChI)
In this clip, Elizabeth, John Becker's daughter, shares her personal story of dedication, love, and the challenges she's faced while caring for father. Caregiving is a journey that often goes uncelebrated, yet these caregivers have graciously allowed us a glimpse into their world.
Watch the full video here.
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